My distress checklist for Carers, Partners, Family and Friends

Being in a relationship with someone who has BPD is hard. It requires a lot of thinking on your feet. A lot of open communication and forgiveness on both sides.
I frequently get angry at my husband when he says or does something that is triggering for me. It takes a lot of trial and error to work out those triggers. It takes understanding that “silly triggers” such as him “slamming the microwave door” can send me into the flight, fight or freeze mode. In these situations, my husband and I use this framework to know what to do next. I have also sent this framework to several loved ones so they too are knowledgeable in helping someone in distress. Continue reading My distress checklist for Carers, Partners, Family and Friends

My ‘Logical List’ of reasons to avoid/reduce my self-harm

If you struggle with self-harm you are not alone. It is a behavour that is often misunderstood and requires more sensitive treatment from health care professionals. When I feel the urge come on, I quickly think or look at this list to remind me that self-harming also has its consequences. If you are someone who struggles with mental health issues I encourage you to develop … Continue reading My ‘Logical List’ of reasons to avoid/reduce my self-harm

“You should be locked up and the key thrown away”

Trigger Warning Two weeks ago, I was confronted by a fellow Aussie. He told me “That I am crazy and, should be locked up with the key thrown away”. Initially, when I read the comments it felt like my soul had just been trampled on. And I started to question myself. AM I? SHOULD I BE LOCKED UP? Moments later I felt a deep sadness … Continue reading “You should be locked up and the key thrown away”

When you judge me, do you judge you?

Judement is such as easy thing to do. I would say it is an automatic thought that helps us feel better about ourselves at the expense of another. Often this judgement comes from people who are suffering and see themselves poorly. How do I know? Because I was a judger. I judged everything and everyone. Partly my anxiety makes me think the world hates me. … Continue reading When you judge me, do you judge you?

11 steps towards accepting your Mental illness

I often get asked, “how did you accept that you have BPD?”. There is no simple answer to this as everyone’s life history and values are different. However, through reflecting there are some things that I know that has helped me accept that I have this chronic illness. The Past:When my doctor first suggested the term out depression I freaked. I thought no, he is … Continue reading 11 steps towards accepting your Mental illness