Mental illness and the Weather – Coping with the changes

The weather is a common trigger for people with mental health difficulties. For some, summer can be really tough as it means wearing short sleeves, or overheating in long ones; it means more social activities, and longer days. For some, winter is really tough. I know my mental health is worse in winter; I feel trapped by the snow, the cold makes my scars hurt, … Continue reading Mental illness and the Weather – Coping with the changes

A letter to all of those suffering in silence

Ever since I was little, I was surrounded by information and news and discussions around physical health and physical illness. I heard about diabetes, obesity, cardiovascular disease, stroke, weight loss, weight gain, an endless list. Why did I never hear these same discussions being had about mental health and mental illness? Continue reading A letter to all of those suffering in silence

My distress checklist for Carers, Partners, Family and Friends

Being in a relationship with someone who has BPD is hard. It requires a lot of thinking on your feet. A lot of open communication and forgiveness on both sides.
I frequently get angry at my husband when he says or does something that is triggering for me. It takes a lot of trial and error to work out those triggers. It takes understanding that “silly triggers” such as him “slamming the microwave door” can send me into the flight, fight or freeze mode. In these situations, my husband and I use this framework to know what to do next. I have also sent this framework to several loved ones so they too are knowledgeable in helping someone in distress. Continue reading My distress checklist for Carers, Partners, Family and Friends

Grieving for someone who is alive

Her smell, her embrace, her laugh, her seriousness, her favourite colour, her jewellery, our jokes, our late night sleep overs. I remember how much I loved her, how intensely I needed her acceptance, validation and her friendship. I remember making promises of a life time of friendship and jokes of being an “aunty” to her children. I remember how afraid I was of losing her… … Continue reading Grieving for someone who is alive

When you judge me, do you judge you?

Judement is such as easy thing to do. I would say it is an automatic thought that helps us feel better about ourselves at the expense of another. Often this judgement comes from people who are suffering and see themselves poorly. How do I know? Because I was a judger. I judged everything and everyone. Partly my anxiety makes me think the world hates me. … Continue reading When you judge me, do you judge you?